Thursday, December 14, 2006

that extrah scr'enff piFF!

a few years back, Neiratko told me he's interviewed Juvenile, Trick Daddy, and some other southern rapper who's huge now, and instead of the usual Q&A, he played all these dudes in Scrabble. while that sits as one of the ten piFFest & possibly funniest moments in journalism, ladies & gentlemen- we have a new entry. enjoy...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

im completely speechless. seriously. i could just exit the blog right now, but naw. todays a celebration. it's Dave Carnie's birthday, and it's my last night living in this apt. i guess no more of this...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

oh well. so for my encore, i present.. that extrah-scr'enff piFF. roll the tape.

well im outta here! catch me on the gulf coast. jeah!

Monday, December 11, 2006

Roast piFF, Collie Weed & Cornbread

this blogs brought to you by igottheinternetgoingnuts and its associates. real quick. rob brink folks:

i like that dude. he doesnt boogie board, and furthermore- he doesnt lack common sense.and whaddup to my man Lupe Fiasco on his GQ Man of the Year award. so while yall are still mad at dude for making a song about skating, im gonna continue to congratulate dude on not only his continued success(without mention of skateboarding), but for also not being called out by Lil Wayne. yeah man. in related news, "the best rapper alive" Lil Wayne has taken over presidential status on the FPM(FukkPharrellMovement). first off, i don't, nor would i even want to know Pharrell. at all. nor do i know Lil Wayne. what i do know is Wayne asked, "who the fukk is this guy(Pharrell)? you respect this guy?" now THAT, is some funny shit! he said- "do you respect him". wow! see, the best part about shit like this is when theres one grown man speaking to, or about another grown man, you somehow get other grown ass men involved who start talking reckless shit, just for the sake of being heard. i personally can't stand this ole Captain Kirk/Captain Save-a-hoe mentality, but it is what it is, i suppose. now in this case- it's the Clipse. uhh, shouldnt these guys be more worried about pushing Gold, and keeping a recording contract, than what someone said about their boss? then again, these are the same guys who said ,"Pharrells hood.. don't let him fool you. Pharrell's from the hood". jesus. Bill Cosby should've just called the show "Black people say the darndest things" and had rappers on it. back to the story. so these guys have been throwing shots at one another for the past few days, and no ones been shot by Pharrell yet, so we'll see where this goes. personally, if i were Pharrell, id throw up that ridiculous looking gang-sign and just teleport myself into Wayne's comfort zone. oh.. thats not what that signs for? damn. im dumb..

see this guy...
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

see this book..
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

GO BUY IT!! brush up on your reading skills. its also alot easier to read than myspace, if thats a good selling point. speaking of myspace, where the hells that photo on my previous blog? somebody done snitched'did on piFF. thats too bad. hey! there it is. look down! celebration bitches! looks like ill just have to pull out this one too...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

i dont know whats more wrong with that photo. the fact that Andy McDonalds even that close to the Gonz, the fact he wore a cotton billboard to a gallery opening, or the ultimate fact- he isnt supposed to have his phone on in a gallery. the last facts so easy, even a caveman can do it.

i forgot how piFF Lee "Scratch" Perry was until i picked up "Roast Fish, Collie Weed, & Cornbread" the other day. i also forgot i have to move out of the apt this week, so i gots shit to do this week like... put my shit in a bag and fly home or a premier? speaking of premiers, i lost my birth certificate & social at the Brooklyn premier(Enids) about 2 weeks ago. i also lost my phone, the charger, and a bunch of other expensive, random shit i'd conjured up that day, but obviously- my social & birth certificates something that you don't need floating around. needless to say, so im sitting at my girls house about a week ago, and i decide to do my monthly voicemail check. low and behold, its RB and he says they've found both my social & birth certificate at the bar and he needs an address to send it to. mind you- ive only flown across the country and back at least 6 times this year, w/no id whatsoever. hey. at least i found my phone.. im outta here. i got a book to work on. seriously this time though. jeah!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

"some ole, smart, dumb cats..."- pretty tony

recently, i wrote a article in theSkateboardmag stating my opinion on Transworld Business'stupid ExposureMetermahjigglet. i simply stated that a)it was stupid(which it is..), and b)whoevers job it is, could you imagine this person explaining there job to another person. "yeah dude, i pretty much just go through skateboard magazines and count sticker placement, and labeling on skateboarders.. its pretty tight". exactly. as i said- its just, awesomely pathetic. and the thought of having a conversation about who gets the most "coverage" on a skateboard , is..... whats the word? oh yeah- sad. by the way, at least 90% of what you just read, is simply- fact. its also funny. some people cant take a joke...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

wow.. they gave me my OWN SECTION!?!?!

SICK! MORE "EXPOSURE" FOR ME! I WIN!(and being in the business of "exposure", you should KNOW theres no such thing as "bad publicity/exposure". cmon man. id hope you'd AT LEAST be smarter than this?! youre killing me here.)

really quick- i wonder if they know im not a pro skater anymore? hmm? i mean- they ARE transworld business right? you'd think, at least THEY, if anyone, would know if i had a board on the market, or whom i ride for- right? and wasnt i the HOST of that Red Bull tour? call me crazy- but i dont think John Madden takes his pads & helmet to the game on Monday night, right?(although i did take my board, as i do everywhere i go) lets see here. one of us could be absolutely right? the other one of us- probably had their feelings hurt.. yall need a hug. a big one. while im at it- what up with the "word up" reference too? what the..? ooooh! i get it! how dumb of me! i'd personally go "jive turkey" or something in that range, or.... what the fukk. step it up man. and why didnt they address what & why i said that article, plus that job- straight SUCK? weird... lastly, in reference to my comparison to K-Fed & Nick Lachey... uh.... say what u want, but we all got better JOBS, better girls, and lastly- better LIVES than a guy who counts stickers and logo placement in skateboard magazines. pa-fukkin-thetic huh? get the fukk outta here! this message has been brought to you by-"ipromisenottousemyeditorialcolumndissingtheseworthlessfukks" and its associates. these views and reflections have nothing to do with the nice folks over at Transworld Skateboarding or any of their employees, besides this pathetic Stan.(if you want a reference to "Stan", look two blogs down)

so thats it- im gonna start rapping. tomorrow though. i got a slight hangover, and personally dont feel like puffing blunts at the studio and playing Madden all night tonight

BREAKING NEWS PEOPLE- it has come to our knowledge, that the guy who wrote that article, and didnt leave his name, that said individual is a BOOGIE BOARDER. wow. he's literally- NOT A STAND UP GUY FOLKS...

okay. i wanna warn you ahead of time. what you're about to see is REALLY funny, and its in no way meant to harm whomever, or their feelings in anyway whatsoever..

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

uh.... WOW. now i KNOW FOR A FACT that Ryan Sheckler's NOT GAY. Ive met his girlfriend- and shes fine, AND shes also has a good job. back to the photo. so my friend emailed this to me earlier, plus a photo of Andy McDonald wearing a Verizon tee-shirt, typing on some Verizon phone at a Mark Gonzales gallery opening. after going into complete shock, as im sure you will once you've seen this, i emailed it to some friends and this is some of the reponses i got.

"i dont even mind gay people, ijust hate gay people like THAT.."- monihan

"does it looks suspect?! there's a whole slew of dudes drinking with their shirts off.. its fuckin December! waaaaay suspect"- lance

feel free to throw some comments back. im also gonna post this @, so feel free to add any comments there as well. im sorry but this shits way too funny to pass up. im out. jeah!