Friday, January 18, 2008

"the truth, that piFF and everything evident"

first and foremost.. its about 6am, and im sitting next to a pool in he hills. u mad, Scooby? tell em why u mad after this intro.. roll da tape!

bwahahahhahahahhahaha.. hold up.. was that Billy Zane(of "Just One of The Guys fame"), or Blind Skateboards own, Jake Duncombe? Speaking of Blind, Happy Anniversary to Bill & Jennifer Weiss. matter of fact. happy 12th anniversary to "whatever the fukk" Weiss, Neiratko & myself were doing for a week in Houston with 8Ball & MJG. by the way folks- thats a true story. we really did live with 8ball & MJG for a week. poor Neiratko. showed up so innocent, and look at him now..

speaking of now. now- i dont work for 4cast. nope. the bum of a "owner", doesnt/didnt pay me/anyone. as a matter of fact- come to find out, Ghostface doesn't even endorse the Ghostface doll! why, some may ask? because he dont/didnt get paid either! weird. as a matter of fact, i dont even think he owns a doll! basically. lies x lame excuses x shady ass business practices= 4cast/the makers of the Ghostface doll. so, yeah. im done. good luck to whomevers spending their hard earned moneys there. and good luck to Ghost getting any money off the no-name bum, making scratch off your name. oh yeah. word to the wise- i wouldnt be walking around LA, going out to clubs, etc.. if you owe ME money. i WILL shake you down. and i KNOW your bummy ass is reading this. so.. youknowhatitis

in the "what the fukkery" side of things.. we got some good ole fashioned 'cism heating up, and i need all to bare witness. so this bish..
thas Kelly Tilghman. fukk that bish, and heres exactly why. about 2 weeks ago while reporting live from the Mercedez Benz Championship(oddly enough, at the "Plantation Course at Kapalua"), good ole Kelly decided to give her take on Tiger Woods and "what it would take for the other competitors, to somehow defeat him" being the eloquent young lady she is, Kelly rifles off- "Lynch him in a back alley..", all before turning to the camera, and broadly smiling. please. click this link, people. back to the story.. so to add insult to injury,the following week GolfWeek magazine decides to run a noose on the cover.. actually. look.
A NOOSE! for golf?! holy bejesus! and not only did they actually run the cover, but that bish only got a 2 week suspension! 2 weeks! ive been expelled from school for less. this scag gets a 2 week paid vacation, until everything "cools off"? so, lemme get this right. whats that weird lookin brothas name? Isaih Thomas? They made this nikka go to rehab, lost his job, and all that- just for saying the word FAG. FAG?! bwahahahahhahaha.. u fukkin serious? u say FAG in some corners of the world, u get what some people call a "cigarette". but, back to my point. so, its been about 2 weeks and Tigers not blurted a word. what the fukkery? im glad theres still some folks out there who actually use their media power intelligently, and shed some light on shyt like this. ladies and gentlemen- i bring to you, Rob Parker. my man. SPEECH! "Tiger Woods would rather be a pitch-man, than be a MAN.." now THAT my friends, was some real fukkin tawk! Rob Parker= the truth, that piFF and everything evident.*salutes this man*

whos responsible for this?
cause i want one.. actually. all four. just wanted to throw that out there...

and since im on my ignorant shyt for a minute.. tell me asong worser than this:

jesus... just.. jesus. i hate him.. alot. serious question. why dont any of these dumb ass rappers know who Stephen Fetchit is? or do they even care?

before i get outta here, i think its of utmost importance that everyone see this video part. alot of people go unnoticed in this skateboard game. alot. this is one of my all time favorites video parts, from a cat ive not only patterned alot of my swag, stunts, and whatnot off of. but this is one of the BEST TO EVER DO IT. folks. Sean Sheffey. Life Video.. im outta this bish. enjoy....

Thursday, January 10, 2008

choice is yours. you can hate, or you participate..

so the other day, im siitin at home and i get this in the mail.. smh. roll the tape.

and that my friends- is why i love T.O.! im saying. if you hate a guy whos single-handedly carried the last 3 teams hes played for into the playoffs, you straight lost at life. if you hate a guy because of his skin color- your Pops shoulda wiped you off on a napkin. im tellin yall- these haters need to really step they jobs up..

on another note... im probly having the best year of my existence, and the shyt aint even into its 2nd week! i went on a date with Muh'lissa(schwing!). got my Mothers entire house pretty much rebuilt, yard "creted", etc- for FREE, without stepping one foot outta my city(imma Boss, B. fareal..) Bout to get my entire mouth so fresh, an so clean- "3stacks" might return to the way he rhymed on ATLiens. and lastly... know what? fukk it! im entering Tampa Pro this year. somebody send me some info on that bish, so i can get it over to my manager.. yall should get a manager. preferably one, Beth. she has snacks, piFF, and shes cooler than half the people ive met in the last 15 yrs. but back to my point- Tampa Pro. Im there. and i might bring Kareem..

so.. whats wrong with this picture?
same thing i was saying- NOTHING. good googly moogly, this woman is FINE! i think i need a "Hot Pocket" now.

uh.. uh! i believe we have our first big winner, of the year.. drum roll please. in accordance with all laws of Nigga'dom, i present to one Jason Shelton the first "Nigga Please" award of 2008.. with excellence in the artistry of man-handling expensive ass lik's @ Jay-Zs new 40/40 club New Years Eve, escaping possible Amber Alerts, and all around straight fukkkery. i find no better recepient than my man Jay for this award... here ya go Jay. you that nukka!
once again.. yall give it up for my man- J. and honorable mentions go out to KT for not answering his phone the week after the Steelers got crushed by the Jags, and lastly- to Mr. & Mrs. Pat Duffy who recently had a kid, but due to "Finnish tradition", cant tell anyone the name of their new kid for a few weeks. real talk- that baby was made with American dyck, and concieved in an American household. Pat- yall really trippin this time. but congratulations to both you and wifey on your newborn. ill holla..

hey! i almost forgot.... i just got this in the mail the other day.jeah! International piFF! i just wanted everyone to know that. Shout out to man Dave Appleby, and the staff at Expose mag. i told yall,"its finna be a hot summer..get my fukkin pool in the back!" Killa!

i just got exclusive audio from Ghostface Killahs new Pretty Tone book... gaaaaaaaawdayum, is this dude a genius! yknow what- fukk it. im starting a online petition to get a Ghostface/Gucci Mane CD released for 3rd quarter '08. choice is yours. you can hate, or you participate.. im saying- these cats swagger, is at dangerously high levels these days.. stay tuned.

speaking of swag.. whos fukkin with this overwhelming amount of swaggery?

i apologize about the last 30 seems as if one of them ate the rest of the footage, but nonetheless- thas some straight classic piFFlery. but i gotta scat. going to Elwood(i just did a piece for them.. *checks off yet, another accomplishment*)to drop my man Palmer off a Ghostface doll. then im going by Diamond to grab some shat. then... basically-i can do what the fluck i want. golf, anyone? im calling Carnie. maybe he can be my caddy. hell. it only takes one arm to drink, hand me a club, and drive the cart. im goin by Jackass, to get this dude.. im out. jeah!

Thursday, January 03, 2008

im steppin in harder this year...

pardon my absence, but on some real tawkery- i actually been on "spring break" since this piFFlery hit Video Music Box.. axe my real brother, KT. he 'ont lie! man, roll the gawt damn tape...

there aint nuthin in the world gooder than when he mush'did Hurricane G. Red' probly had her weave sittin at a 45degree axis, like a mul'phukkin beret! can i get a "Amen"?

so... recently, Amish and I were given some dude named "MF Doom"s mask.. im personally not into weirdo azz rappers, so excuse me for not knowing about this R-Kelly azz nikka.. anyhow, "Dooms" mask needed some repairs, as the gem had fallen out the forehead due to the strain he put on the metal while rhyming the word "apocalypse", with "7-11 Nacho dip". so, Dooms manager hands over the mask, and his only "request" is that "that sh!t better not be in no photos, blogs, whatever.. im serious." him must not know me very well. first thing i did when i reached the crib, was put the mask on, and take flicks. real tawk- HOOOOLY SHYT, does this nikkas mask smell like a used, Negro League glove! whas this dude wash his face with- a old sock? upon further investigation, not only did i find out it was actually Russell Crowes mask from the Gladiator, but that this dude Doom also has imposters who lip-sync at his show.. now. before anyone gets their panties in a bunch, lemme show u something.. okay. see this guy?
uhh, thas not "Doom". now.. you see that scar on his right hand? okay- hold that thought... now, see this guy?
look at the right hand.. i close my case. word to Mrs. Caroline on First 48.

ok.. im gonna do something unappropiate, but i bet NOBODY says anything.. so the other day, i got this photo
and.. well. i just wanted the world to know- i got that photo. no harm, no foul right?

i heard it was some bums out there talm bout they got "da Bast blog".. bwahahahhaahahaha.. fa'real. how is a blog with a bunch of dudes wearing funny lookin cotton fukkin wit me? real tawk? im saying.. then i always come through with some shyt like this for instance.. you see that? now you tell me- where the fukk else you gonna find a lank, so you can track any cellhpone? Beyonces "hot pocket"? Redman's "Hardcore" promo? fa'real, yall aint fukkin with me. "im on the top flo', no neighbors.." ya smell my cologne? and whaddup to my man Jimmmy "Swagger" Gorecki.. i see you folk.

anybody seen Ice-Ts wife's, tittays? hollatchaboi.. is it me, or her nipples look like pimento loaf? what?

in unrelated news, for all you haters out there- ive found you some solice. what i have here is a map of ALL the hate groups in the US. pick your poison. and if you see your "group"(ie:magazines, companies, your girl, my exes, etc) aint on there- well, im sure you can be added. step ya hate game up, folks. you only got 4 years left! bums...

in closing.. hold on.. i forgot to play a video! new shit! Lupe & Gemnini- We On.. lets go!

well gaaaaaaaaawdamn! i was bumpin the song last summer, but.. but.. DAYUM, that shyt is "bang-a-gong"!!! i mean, this n!kka said, "us taking it light, is taking it too far.."?! imma go ahead and say that songs official- dope boy fresh. im also gonna go ahead and get up outta the crib.. i gotta go to my managers to "discuss things", and get some money. then, i may go to Andrew Reynolds and knock out this interview. or maybe ill go by Jackass studios. or skate the bowl at Supreme.. or.. maybe ill just bring my ass back home, make some more money. and before i go- to everyone writing in asking me "what happened to Clydes Corner..", well the answer is... actually. imma let them tell yall. "this is chess. not checkers.." im out.. jeah!